So I ran out of muffins for breakfast this morning and I had (unwisely) already offered to give the kids muffins for breakfast. I should have checked my supplies first, but stupid me, I kept going. So, I have one package of the hostess mini muffins left. There are five muffins per package and both kids are starting to crank up their whining meters when they start to realize that there is only one bag. Which kid should get it? The kid who whines the most or the one who doesn't? I actually find this to be a difficult decision. If you give the muffins to the kid who whines the most then the kid is basically being rewarded for his behavior or at least getting his way. But, the whiney kid is then quiet (a very compelling result) and the other, less whiney, kid is whining, but has settled for something less than muffins. On the other hand, if you give the less whiney kid the muffins (to reward his less annoying behavior) then you end up with the whiney kid embarking on a full-fledged fit, lying on the ground, legs kicking and tears flowing. (Yes, I know they are brats sometimes).
So, this morning, I decided to split the 5 muffins (2 in one sandwich bag and 3 in the other) and then split a breakfast bar (1/2 in each sandwich bag) to make up the difference for the incomplete bag of muffins. Well, this did not go over well. Evie melted down on the kitchen floor with big crocodile tears and a look on her face as if I just told her I spent her college fund on liposuction. I just don't know what was so awful about having to split up the muffins. Luke also was not satisfied and said, "I don't like 3 muffins, I like 5 muffins" in that oh so annoying kid voice that they take on when they're being brats. WTF?!? I'm doing my best here to be King Solomon and the kids are still pissed at me! Well, eventually, I told them (and can't decide if this is over the line as a mean mother) that they could either have the muffins and cereal bar I gave them or they could have no breakfast at all, and I reached to take away their bags of food. Each child pulled their food out of my reach and gave me a dirty look. Then, both of them dried up their tears and switched to what is intended to be guilt inducing sniffling. And that was the end of it. Seriously, why can't they just accept the fact that I don't have another bag of muffins, which, in case I haven't mentioned, I fully explained to them and offered them alternative breakfast foods.
This sort of episode is what makes being a mother wearing rather than rewarding. It is everyday and it really does add to the shit you take everday, thus decreasing your tolerance for more shit at work. Usually this isn't a problem (thank Heaven), but one must wonder if this is what stay-at-home moms go through all day long. Seriously, I wouldn't make it a week as a SAHM.
Oh, yes, and that episode came after Luke threw a fit about not wanting to wear his swim suit to splash day at school because he didn't want to wear wet clothes. I assured him that his swim suit was not wet and he could change out of it as soon as splash day was over. Why don't they believe me? I really don't lie to them very often. I'll admit that I do sometimes. For example, Luke asked me how the baby comes out and I was really rather disinclined to tell him any more than that the doctor helps the baby come out of my belly at the hospital. Unfortunately, I know there are more questions ahead, such as "How did the baby get in your belly, Mommy?" That is the one I'm not sure how to answer for a four-year old. Any suggestions?