Wednesday, July 1, 2009

A typical trip to the restroom

I met Chuck at Papasitos (a Mexican restaurant that we frequent) last night and as soon as I got there, Luke walked up to me doing the pee pee dance and holding his privates. He hopped from one foot to the other and said, "Potty!" I smiled, set my purse down, took his hand and headed to the restroom. We pushed into the restroom and Luke asked (as if he didn't know), "Is this the ladies room?" I responded, "Yes." Luke, "I don't want to go in the ladies room. I want to use the men's room." Me, "I'm a girl, so we have to go in the girls restroom." Luke whined, "But I don't like it." I closed the door behind us as I pushed his shuffling feet into the stall. The first thing he asked was, "Is this a loud toilet?" I responded, already dreading the conversation that was sure to follow, "No, I don't think so." (Sometimes white lies are okay if you're faced with the option of having your kid pee his pants).

Luke reached up and flushed the toilet. The "KerWoosh-Gurgle-Gurgle!" of the toilet proved without a doubt that the toilet was in fact a loud toilet - a fact I already knew. Luke started to whimper and backed up into me as I asked with exasperation, "Why in the world did you flush the toilet?!" Without answering my question he said, "It is loud! I don't want to go potty!" I rolled my eyes and pushed his shoulders forward toward the toilet, "You obviously have to go potty. It's no big deal. Just go in the toilet." I pushed him forward again and he hid his face in my skirt. I made a mental note to put that skirt in the drycleaning pile. Luke, "I want to go in a urinal." Me, "There isn't a urinal in here. Just go. Stop being silly." He started to fuss as I pushed him forward and said, "Luke! You HAVE to go potty. Now go." He stood there and announced again, "No, I want to use the urinal in the men's room!" I finally start to lose my patience. "No, you have to go in here." I reached down and pulled down his pants at which point I asked, "Oh my goodness, do you have your underwear on backwards?" Luke, "I like it that way," wimper, sniff. Me, "Ugh, just go potty." He started to pee, finished, and rushed away from the toilet. I reached down to pull up his pants and the toilet automatically flushed causing him to jump and reach around me for the door. I gently reminded him that he had to pull up his pants. He didn't seem to care. We went to wash our hands, and he stated firmly, "Next time, I want to use the men's room." O00-kay, my little therapy-bound son.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oye, with the poodles already!! Is what you should have said.

Mom said...

I guess we are back to tales of the kids again. I love it. I so enjoy watching the grandkids through your eyes. One never knows what is going to come out of their little heads next.

Theresa said...

Anonymous - I'll definitely try that next time! Love it!

Emily said...

Maddie has the same issue with loud toilets - she makes me wait to flush her toilet after she's left the stall and it drives me crazy! She covers her ears every single time. Glad to hear my kid isn't the only one and maybe I should take her to a concert, kill off some of that special hearing- or maybe to a gun range - that ought to do it.... Wait I need her to be able to hear for me when I'm 80. Nevermind. I'll keep flushing for the little booger. :)

Jess said...

We have this same problem with Nicholas. He hates loud flushing toliets and never wants to use the ladies room. Sometimes, if I know no one is in the men's room, I will let him go in there while I hold the door partially open. It saves the hassle and the arguement. And, he is done in a flash without having touched anything in the restroom. Easy peasy.

lisawitt said...

oh my! boys!!! what i have to look forward to! ;-)