Bad Birthday and Cub Scouts

So Evie got a real surprise for her birthday last night . . . a fever of 102. Poor baby. She has the worst luck. She spent the evening on the couch watching a brand new Barbie movie that she got for her birthday yesterday. It was rather pathetic.

As for Luke, well he had his first pack meeting for cub scouts. Quite frankly, before I got there, I had no idea what the difference was between a den meeting and a pack meeting, but let me tell you that I learned a lot from my first cub scout meeting. Wow.

When I first got there, I felt like I was attending a secret society meeting. They have a special handshake. Yes, they really do. Everyone was soooo nice! When I signed Luke in, I asked the guy who was checking everyone in if it was okay for me to be there. He said, "Of course!" and then began telling me that they welcome den mothers and mothers are welcome to volunteer and participate in any way possible. I said, "Well that's great, but is it okay if I just sit in a corner and read my book?" He looked a little disappointed and Luke and I moved on to find his den. (Apparently a den is a smaller group within the pack.)


Luke was hopping around like crazy in his seat and driving me crazy. On a bright note, I sat with the other slacker parent who actually put me and Chuck to shame with his efforts. I was just glad Chuck had put together Luke's uniform and sewed on all the patches, because Lord knows I don't sew. Not. A. Single. Stitch. That's not to say I can't sew, just that I choose not to. I digress.

So here are some of the things that I experienced at my first cub scout meeting:

1. Posting of the Colors (by 8-year old boys)

2. The watermelon cheer (you need a visual to understand)

3. Singing "Home on the Range"

4. Funny kid jokes which cracked every little kid up. Luke even turned to me and said, "Are you writing these down?" as he continued to crack up. So here are some of the hilarious jokes they told:

Q: Why didn't the chicken skeleton cross the road?
A: Because he didn't have enough guts.

Q: Why did the cow cross the road?
A: He wanted to get to the moo-vies.

Q: Have you seen the new pirate movie?
A: It's rated "Aaarrrr".

Q: Why did the rooster cross the road?
A: To cocka-doodle-doo something.

Yup. The laughter was loud and continuous. Whew.

5. The dolphin cheer (also needs a visual, but let me tell you it is worth seeing)

6. Then they made announcements and awarded belt loop thingies (there is a formal word for this, but I can't remember what).

At the end of the evening, I gathered Luke and started to head out the door. The same guy that greeted me at the beginning again informed me that mothers are always welcome to participate with everything and emphasized that they have had den mothers before. I smiled sweetly and said, "Thanks. I tell you what, as soon as you make the uniforms pink and sparkly, I'll join up." He looked at me with disappointed disgust and said, "Ugh. I don't think so. No, no, no. You can't be that bad." I nodded my head and said, "Yup."

We made our exit. And that, my friends, is why I will probably never be a den mother.


But I'm still a mom, driving a cub scout around in my minivan while he eats his McDonald's Happy Meal, and his soccer ball rolls around on the floor of the vehicle. It amazes me that I am this mom.