Tuesday, June 8, 2010

*Shaking my head with disappointment*

Saturday afternoon Luke politely asked, "Mommy, what kind of people are fat people?"

Me, "Um . . . Wow . . . Hmm . . . I guess all kinds of people are fat people. Young people, old people, white, black, and yellow people. Fat people could be boys or girls, mommies and daddies, grandmas." I shrugged my shoulders. "You know, fat people could be anyone."

Me, in my head, "Oh, he's going to be a messed up little boy. What a weird question."

Sunday afternoon, I was getting ready to go into the pool with the family. I had just rubbed sunscreen on the three little ones and was applying the less than 100 SPF sunscreen to my body which was comfortably, if not attractively, outfitted in my I-Don't-Give-A-Shit-How-I-Look bikini. As I rubbed sunscreen into my stomach, Luke came up to me, pointed to my belly and exclaimed with amusement, "Mommy! You're belly is soooo FAT! You're one of the fat people!"

I stopped rubbing in the sunscreen, sighed and muttered, "Thanks, Luke."

Needless to say, I started back on my diet yesterday.

8 comments:

Liz Rogers said...

Ok, Theresa ... you know you laughed, should've smacked him, but hey .... he's only a little kid .... good gosh, remind me to never EVER come around him in my suit (for more reasons than 1, he'd be scarred for life) ... and yes, I'm still laughing ..... your old "fat" x co-worker ..... LIZ

Theresa said...

He's not *that* little. He definitely should have been smacked! Little shit. I honestly couldn't believe that he laughed and pointed. Ugh.

Anonymous said...

It's still funny as sh*t though, I need to spend some time with these guys!!!!!

Let's have lunch with Lucy next week, I think her festivities are all over and done ..... I'll round you guys up .....

Fattie Fatterton said...

You could be like my mom and point out that it's his fault that the belly isn't the same as it was before kids.

I was her only C-section...And in 1972 they cut up and down not across.

Theresa said...

Ms. Fatterton - You know I would tell him all about it, but I figure I deserve some of the crap he doles out since I give him his fair share of crap too. For example, every time I catch him holding himself I ask, "Uh, so how's your penis doin'?" To which he responds, "It itches." Ugh!!!! Honestly, I think we created the monster.

Oh, and God bless your mom. No C-section for me. A more important part of me was affected by the birthing process and I don't think I can have that repaired as easily as I could get a tummy tuck.

The Potters said...

NOOOOO! That cracks me up!!! (You are NOT fat.) One time I asked my mom's friend if she told a lot of lies. She asked why, and I replied that she had a very long nose. Yep, I remember it. Kids say the darnedest (sp?) things.

Theresa said...

Oh Krista! That's fantastic!

Lisa said...

OMG, you are SO NOT FAT! I would be scared to see what Luke would think of me! You look great theresa!