Monday, December 8, 2008

More than One Private Part

During bath time this weekend, Luke proudly pointed out his penis and then pointed below his penis and asked "What is that?" I love that he was so matter of fact about it. At first I wasn't sure what he was pointing to, because it looked like he was pointing out his penis again (and we had clearly established that he knows what his penis is). He pointed again, a little closer this time and I realized he was pointing to his testicles. So, I responded, "Those are your testicles." His next question was not as easy to answer, "What are they for?" Me, "Hmmm . . . (debating whether I should really tell him) I think they make semen. Maybe you should ask Daddy. Only boys have testicles." Him, "Girls don't have testicles?" Me, "No. Only boys." Him, "You don't have testicles?" Me, "No." Him, "What are testicles for?"

I decide it is time for a man to explain what testicles do, so I leaned my head out the bathroom door and shouted, "Chuck, what do testicles do?" Chuck, "They make sperm." Me, leaning back into the bathroom and looking at Luke, "Yup, they make sperm." Him, "What does sperm do?"

Me, but in my head, "Awe hell! How did I get into this?" Me out loud, "Umm, sperm helps make babies." Now, I'm thinking I've stepped into quicksand and I quickly try to bail out saying, "Um, but only big boys make sperm that can make babies." I quickly amend it, "Only Daddies can make babies." Luke, "Babies?" He sounds very suspicious, but thankfully does not question it as I change the subject to washing his hair. Crisis narrowly averted. Better get ready for next time.

On that note, I discovered the following book in the kid's section at Barnes & Noble. It is a book written and illustrated in 1977 called, "Where Did I Come From?" It describes sexual intercourse in words and descriptions that kids will understand. It shocked the hell out of me. I was just browsing the shelves while the kids played with the trains at the local B&N and I noticed this book set among the Human Health books in the kid's section. I flipped through the pages and couldn't believe my eyes as I saw illustrated Mommies and Daddies, full on with pubic hair, breasts, and penises. The book named all the parts such as vagina, penis, testicles, sperm, etc. and then went on to describe the act of making love, specifically stating that the Daddy puts his penis in Mommy's vagina. I was seriously taken aback.

I started to do a little research on this book online and found out that it is a highly recommended book - even Dr. Spock recommends it. So, here's a link and you can make your own decisions.,M1

I have to say, I'm leaning toward using this book to educate my children about the logistics of the whole thing. I think the difficult part will be trying to describe or inform them adequately about all the variations on the sexual act that are out there (e.g. oral sex, hummers, etc.). Should prove interesting for me and the kids.


Mary said...

If you think this book might be a little too graphic for Luke's age, there is another one out there that I used with Amber. It is called "What to Expect when your Mommy is Expecting." It is a little more about the baby and less about how it got there - although it is covered in a way.

Joan said...

I think you would have been just fine with "Sperm helps make babies". At his age the details are too much. Abstract concepts are just that, abstract. Developmentally, he is ready for the names of the body parts. Amy and Colt got the actual names and were aware that pubic hair is on grown-ups only and that only grown-ups can make babies.
I don't recall using any book.
I also taught Colt how to do the testicular self exam a couple of years ago and he does it when he showers. He actually told me he has a bump on the interior and we went to a web site on anatomy so he could see the vas deferens and epidydimus (sp?). Amy learned the breast self exam this past year and does it after each period.
We have also had the discussion about other sexual variants in the world and STDs (with nursing school pictures) and what is considered deviant sexual behavior.
I think I'd rather do the "What are testicles?". Wanta' trade?

Theresa said...

No thank you to Joan. I'm certain they are learning more than I know. Did you ever see Stepmom? Julia teaches the daughter what "snowballing" is or something like that. I still have no idea what that is. What am I going to do when they know these things and I don't?

Strange, but I think I could explain sex stuff to Amy and Colt and not have a problem with it. They just seem old enough to handle it even if it does gross them out.

Theresa said...

Okay, I just looked up snowballing, and omg that is nasty, but then again there are a lot of nasty sexual practices out there. Enough about that. I don't think I have to worry about that or about explaining sex to the kids for several more years.

Joan said...

Apparently, you know more than I do now. I have no earthly idea what 'snowballing' is. I'll ask my spouse since he knows EVERYTHING, (or at least a whole lot more than I know).
Hey, It is time to go home for me, you should probably be going home too. Love you - Joan

Jess said...

We have been definitely dealing with the "Where do babies come from?" a lot these days. I thought it would fade away once Lorelai's newness wore off. Boy was I wrong. The Boy has a mind like a steel trap and doesn't forget the things I have told him and the things I have avoided. The new question last week was...where did Lorelai come out of you body...notice he didn't say belly. He has figured out there is no hole there. Since we have kids roughly the same age, maybe we can figure out this whole sex ed thing together. They seem to be needing it more and more earlier these days.

Theresa said...

I've actually been pretty lucky regarding Luke's questions about where the baby will come out. He's a little more focused on himself these days.

Kelly said...

I used to have that book when I was a kid!!!